Struggling to be

[Aonaran]

Not heated at all, @NikNik.  If ivana can be direct, why can't I?

I don't see what she posted as "support and strategies" at all.  Who would, honestly, if it was said to them?  It was passing personal judgement, nothing more, and whatever the intended tone, it was friggin' condescending.  If you think that is supposed to be "respected", and that *I'm* the one who crossed the line, then I think that's a problem with these forums.  If people can't talk about their experiences without someone taking the judgemental parent role, unasked -- oh so "supportive" and "respectful" !! -- then it's not a safe place to open up about our experiences.

[ivana]

Wow....thats not how i meant the post at all.

I was saying that i agreed with your perceptions and that you had been mistreated by people and that that wasnt righ't and that the problem was with them and not anything about you or what you done.

When i mentioned "sensitive to interactions" i didnt mean that as a judgment or as condascending.

I meant it objectively.When i was younger i was also sensitive to interactions and if i wasnt able to objectively look at that then i wouldn't have been able to change it.

I also was hoping you would understand i also didn't mean that i thought those people you mentioned wern't in error which is why i wrote "That doesnt mean that they arn't being jerks...."

90% of my post was agreeing that the "call centre" had treated you horribly,thats its horrible instead of simply receiving help that you have to pay the doctors(or whoever) games and deal with their issues,that i agreed about your observations regarding the Mental Awareness programme on the Abc etc..

When i mentioned "sensitive" and the word expectations it was just to offer objectively a coping mechanism and wasnt meant in any way to say anything negative about you or suggesting that you were at fault or criticism etc..

I dont think anything negative regarding you.

[Alessandra1992]

Hey @Aonaran,
Power differentials are often ignored, not always intentionally but sometimes conflicts do occur around what we need/want for our journey to wellness compared to what mental health support services are funded to offer..
Sometimes as well, staff may be relatively new to mental health so are on a learning journey of their own..sometimes people also can make their interactions about themselves rather than the person they're supporting..which can be very frustrating when we are trying to get the helpful help @kristin often refers to..
There are options though to give feedback about your experience depending on where you live. In Victoria we have the Mental Health Complaints Commissioner and VMIAC (Victorian Mental Illness Awareness Council).
Also depending on where you are, there have been some huge changes in accessing services so you might have to ring a central Intake and Assessment Line.. The NDIS is coming so many consumers are concerned they may not be deemed eligible for mental health supports in Victoria for example..
Where r u located? Queensland is going through a review process, and so I am not sure whether that may be creating issues for folks trying to get support..
In the meantime, I was wondering if you would like to come and help me build the virtual bonfire we gave going? I am out of practice in splitting logs for firewood (it's been at least 20 years since I chopped wood) and I am hoping you might like to lend me a hand?

Lovely to see you on the forums again...

[CherryBomb]

Hi everyone,

I saw the conversation that unfolded here on Tuesday night, and I felt like some space was needed to let the dust settle before I could contribute. Forgive me, if this interpretation of the situation is wrong - perhaps others feel like there was no dust to settle. But this is exactly my point, this is my interpretation, and what's true for you, may not hold true for me.

I'm concerned about members on here feeling misunderstood, and it saddens me to think that some members feel disrepected. It can be really upsetting to have someone tell you what you're thinking, when you're not thinking that way at all. And in reverse, it can be equally upsetting for someone to be told they are thinking a certain way, when they are not.

I'd like to point out here that we all bring our own worldviews for seeing a situation. Like this image below, some may see two animals glaring at each other, others will see a tree. What we see and experience in a situation, might be perceived and experienced as completely different for someone else.

[PeppiPatty]

dear @Allexandra1992,
Sandy,

Good message. It's true re: 5 th. sentence.

@Aeneron,

What do you think of Donald Trump's family member running for President? I was
Listening to ABCam radio and a commentator on the radio said there is about 19 Republicans running for President.

[WombatBoots]

Hi @CherryBomb and all, 

If I may indulge, I would just like to share some opinions I have of online text based only communication.

I have had a fair amount of experience with online text based communications, like most things there are some great positives from it, it also has it's negatives.

I see the biggest downfall from text only communication is that it is very limiting as to what and how you express your feelings and emotions. What's written can easily be misinterpreted.

There is only words, some things that arn't expressed are;

- Body language

- Facial expression

- Vocal tone

etc etc 

I'm a bit of a joker by nature, and more than once I know I have upset people by words that were honestly expressed as humour

In a group based course, I was witness to a very insightful demonstration by one of the presenters. 

It involved a scripted conversation between 2 people, she chose 2 people out of the group to act out the script. She then acted out the exact same script with another person she chose. All the presenter changed was body language/facial expressions/posture etc and her vocal tone. The difference in what was expressed was astounding.

I guess what I am trying to convey is, please keep it in mind when using any online forum, the words only can not always be a complete reflection on what has tried to be expressed. Keep it in mind when reading and writing, and if someone has expressed something that you're not quite sure of, write back to them and ask for clarification.

I hope you all have great weekends

Be kind to yourselves 

Cheers Always

Wombat/Matt

[Former-Member]

Thanks @WombatBoots what a great post, to remind us all about how sometimes the words we write, don't necessarily convey how we want them too.

Thanks for the reminder !!!

[WombatBoots]

@CherryBomb 

apologies, I also meant to mention in my post, I LOVE that picture

there are so many things other than the animal stare off and the tree

perception is fascinating 

thank you

[PeppiPatty]

@WombatBoots you are allowed to write lots and lots......you're true says it all.........a bear eating a green fish!!

[CherryBomb]

@WombatBoots thanks so much for your wonderful insight. Communicating is complex, so it's important to remember that on here in the Forums, it can be even more complicated given the lack of queue. Great point!