BPD - my daughter needs help, i cant find it

[BPDSurvivor]

I’m sorry to hear about what is happening for you and the lack of support you feel you are receiving. @ThatRedHeadChik . I have BPD and it can be so challenging to work with - let alone to live with! 

For me, the self-harm was brought about by the lack of self-identity. My inability to regulate emotions meant I went to extremes when I was upset.

My treatment started with medication for the depression, moods and insomnia, but the main work was through talking to a psychologist and group therapy. It took years for a change to occur.

If you don’t mind me asking, which state do you live in? That will help me direct resources to you.

You can start here: https://www.spectrumbpd.com.au/resources-and-support/for-carers

Spectrum offers online sessions for carers. They are free of charge. Spectrum is a BPD specialist in Victoria.

And yes, I’d certainly go get the mental health care plan. Then start looking for a psychologist. Wait lists are long.

The hardest part is that unless your daughter wants the help and wants things to change, nothing will work. I didn’t ‘wake up’ to this until I was in my 30s. 

Look forward to hearing from you.

You are welcome to have a look at LIVE CHAT: BPD for Friends, Family and Carers - This Sunday 3rd October 7:00-8:30pm AEDT or Raising Awareness of BPD - Flipping the Script 

[ExhaustedCarer]

Stay strong - you sound like you’re being an amazing, resilient support in a really difficult situation. For what it’s worth, my BPD sister had to experience crisis and acute hospitalization before being diagnosed but that was also a pathway to dialectical behaviour therapy. In my observation, the DBT has been a really solid pathway to her living as close a life to “normal” (as problematic as that concept is) as possible. I truly hope you can get her the treatment and support from professionals she needs. Echoing frustration at MH units not always seeing how dire the situation is too! This has been the case for another family member who masks really well in those situations and then shortly after returns to self-sabotaging and destructive ways 😞 

[BPDSurvivor]

@ExhaustedCarer @ThatRedHeadChik , it seems BPD is so stigmatised so people are turned away when they have a BPD diagnosis. It’s so sad. I was told this first hand by my case manager. He said they don’t normally take people with a BPD diagnosis because the resources are so stretched. 

I was only speaking to a carer the other day. He said he has been trying to get his wife into BPD specific therapy for years but because she’s not ‘bad enough’, they won’t take her. He is still waiting while the wife is in and out of hospital all the time and he himself is living on edge all the time.

I hope the will be reforms and more BPD specific services become available.