Topic Tuesday // Talking to your parents about your mental health // Tues. 5 June 7pm AEST

[HayleyC]

Q: What small changes have you or your family made to improve on your mental health?

I think the main thing that has helped with my mental health is my mother being super open about talking about her own mental health issues in the past - with her, there is no stigma around mental illness which helps a lot when you're having a 'bad mental health day' and you can feel comfortable telling her this is casual conversation.

[NikNik]

Welcome @Former-Member Glad you could make it!

[JessieB]

@Snowie Thats really good that you found having your husband join you in your sessions helpful. It really does help when the psychiatrist can help convey your thoughts to your loved ones when you can find the words.

[mindboggle18]

@Gina-Bell,

Totally,  and I know that they are not doing it maliciously or their intent is to distress me it's just that they have no depth of understanding. I'm so good at hiding my actual feelings that they have no idea of what is actually going on so I am trying to communicate more with them about how I feel. I'm thinking of using signas or some thing. ...... like happy,  or sad face stickers that I can stick on the fridge to communicate how things are r going, any other ideas?

[outlander]

Hi @NikNik and everyone

 Hi @JessieB @Gina-Bell and welcome to you both

Im not up for much posting tonight  but am following along 

[Gina-Bell]

@mindboggle18 It can certainly be challenging to bring up self-harm, and thoughts of sucide with anyone, but especially your parents... this is something that comes up a lot for people in your situation. 
Again, it can be helpful to have some information on hand for them to get an educational understanding of the issues. 

We have some articles that might help you over on the ReachOut website that can help debunk some myths or reactions they may have. 
I also really like this infograph : 

[Snowie]

Q: What experiences have you had in your family up until this point?

Q: What small changes have you or your family made to improve on your mental health?

I try and keep my issues away from my family. I have 2 children who are too young to really understand what is going on. 

A small change we have done is if I want to let ny husband know something but cannot talk to him about it, I will write it down and give it to him. I find the whole communicating face to face hard, so writing is easier.

I have also shown him my safety plan so he knows what I need to do and can remind me at times, especially if I am losing it.

[Teej]

Q: What experiences have you had in your family up until this point?

i think the experiences I’ve had have had similar responses from both my kids and my parents. They all want to fix me. The more they become frustrated with me the more they want to fix me. Having said that one of the best things that happened a few years ago was my therapist having a meeting with my parents and kids to explain my mental health to them. For me it had a bigger impact I think coming from her. 

Q: What small changes have you or your family made to improve on your mental health?

after my latest attempt my eldest child was really angry (rightfully so). I ended up giving him my safety plan which helped him. I don’t think I could do that with my parents. 

[JessieB]

@microp Hi! and welcome,

I had the same issue as you. I struggled with my own addiction issues too. And it was very embarrassing for me, especially telling my family the extent of how bad it was. I was also feeling very guilty for all the lies that I had also told them.

For me, the only way I could be truely happy and to be able to get the best treatment possible, was being honest and open with my family and frriends. It wasnt easy, but I did get there. It made such a difference in my recovery too.

If you stay on this forum, I go through some steps to help you start the conversation with your loved ones.

[Gina-Bell]

So many great tips - writing things down can certianly be easier than saying them out loud. 

I also like the idea of having a "communication board" of some kind to express how you're feeling with pictures, or symbols. I've heard of this before as being a "thermometer" type thing on the fridge, where you put a mark at where you're at from "good day" to "bad day" or whatever language you prefer. 

I also think that's a really important point about sharing your saftey plan with someone in your family. Safety comes first