Topic Tuesday // Talking to your parents about your mental health // Tues. 5 June 7pm AEST

[JessieB]

Hi @Snowie, That's good that you can speak with your husband. Have you ever considered having him or your mother sit in a therapy session with you?

I found this very useful in my initial treatment.

[NikNik]

Welcome @Teej - I hope you find tonight helpful from both perspectives of being a parent and talking to your parents!

[mindboggle18]

Yep, by folks I mean parents. They wanted to be a part of a meeting with my psychiatrist and I was super hesitant but thought "well, it's going to happen sooner or later" it went okay but my mum made this comment about how this is just a little blip in my life journey and it's not really going to get it in way. The comment "don't worry you'll get over it" is really annoying me because she doesn't seem to grasp the depth of the situation 

[Snowie]

@JessieBmy husband has been to quite a few of my appointments with the psychologist and the psychiatrist. He/I find it useful especially when I have trouble getting words out and also learning in ways he can help me.

The less my mother knows the better. She would not cope knowing about my past trauma's.

[Gina-Bell]

@Teej @Snowie - That's very true that the difficulties of telling a loved one, applies to all kinds of relationships, not just young people to parents. 

But also adults to their parents, and parents to their adult-kids. 

Communication about mental health is challenging, and emotions are more likley to be heightened when it's with family members. 

Great suggestion @JessieB around sitting in on an appointment - it might take the pressure off of you to do the explaining?

[JessieB]

The second point I would like to discuss is

Understanding that mental illness is not a life sentence; doing small things can help improve how you’re feeling.

People can become depressed or anxious for a wide variety of reasons, and in many instances, those reasons aren't permanent. Depression and anxiety can be due to biological predisposition, life events, or some combination of the two. With the right combination of therapy, commitment to the process, and in some cases, medication, there is reason to be optimistic that you don't have to suffer from depression indefinitely.

When I finally had the courage to speak with my parents about my mental health, we all sat down and discussed different ways in which we could make small changes around the house and in ourselves, that could possibly have a positive impact on my mental health.

My family and I came up with small things we could do in our everyday life to help each other get through some tough times due to a mental illness. These include:

• Avoiding alcohol + other drugs
• Setting realistic goals
• Exercising
• Drinking plenty of water
• Eating healthy
• Surrounding ourselves with positive people.

Not only did these small adjustments in our lives positively impact my mental health, but it also gave my parents and I an opportunity to be really honest and open with each other, giving us all a better understanding into each other’s lives and day to day thoughts.

Q: What experiences have you had in your family up until this point?

Q: What small changes have you or your family made to improve on your mental health?

[mindboggle18]

Hi @Snowie,

I haven't told my parents about my SI, or SH at all. How am I to begin that conversation. They are super naive about MH and are worried they are going to over react and all the ambulance

[Gina-Bell]

@mindboggle18 

That's a difficult situation to be in - sounds like you feel like they are minimising what you're going through. Sometimes this is a way that loved ones deal with what's going on for you as it may be hard for them to accept how much pain you're in. 
It can be hard to convey the severity of your symptoms, and the challenges you're facing. 

[Former-Member]

Hi all I'm really excited for tonight's discussion sorry for the late start but children needed dinner.

I am 25 and I have tried to talk to my mum about my mental health but she belittles me saying that I have never been through the hardships that cause mental health issues like the ones I am diagnosed  but she was also a neglectful mother and her next high was more important than my siblings and my needs.

My step father is different I haven't told him at all and worried because when other family members found out about my mental health issues they tried to have my son taken away from me and I'm worried he will think less of me like the others in my family

[microp]

@JessieB, What do you think helped you build up the courage to sit down and tell your parents about your mental health issues? My partner and mum know about some of my struggles with mental illness and addiction, but its a sugar coated truth. I haven't been able to tell them the whole truth out of guilt, the stigma attached with addiction as being a sign of weakness and the fear of how they would react if they knew the whole truth. So how did you manage to tip the scales towards spilling all the beans rather than keep it bottled up nice and safely inside your brain?