RE: Darkness surrounds me

[Former-Member]

Is it always going to be like this, will I ever get any relief

so many thoughts, so many words stuck in my head

sleep evades me again and again

[Former-Member]

Sorry to all if you had to listen to my garbage last night. Sometimes the only way out is to write down what is in my head so I can think more clearly 🤐🤐🤐🤐

[Former-Member]

Hello @Former-Member

Good to see you made it through a tough night and the forum was able to help you.  Hope today is ok for you.

Take care, MummaMia

[Former-Member]

Why is anxiety so crippling?

It makes me feel so useless at times that I have no control over when it is going to hit me. It seems to have taken over my life to the point where I cannot function properly. Even my daughter noticed tonight for the first time and said, "Mum, why do you always forget things these days?"  I felt like the worst mother in the world. For the last two days she has asked me to get her an ingredient from the supermarket so she could make something, and two days in a row I have forgotten. How hard is it to remember one thing?

Does anyone else feel like this?  If so, how do you make it better?

[Sans911]

@Former-MemberI don't consider what you write to be garbage. It all matters and is important to you. I was happy to listen. I don't always know what to say or do, but your story is as valid as anyone else's

[Former-Member]

Thanks @Sans911

I don't really expect anyone to reply. It's mainly if I keep it bottled up then the consequences of that won't be good. So writing it down gives me short lived relief.

You sound like my psychologist when you say my story is as valid as anyone else's!!! I always disagree with him when he saying something along those lines!!!

[Former-Member]

Safety plans sux sometimes. It doesn't help me and even if I try and use it, I end up doing it to myself anyway. 

I just don't care anymore what happens to me

[Former-Member]

Hour by hour isn't working tonight, lets try minute by minute. 

[Former-Member]

I told myself I wouldn't do this again, go on and on about useless crap, so this is it. 

I think my plan needs to go into the bin again. I feel helpless.  Pain seems to be the only option left

[Former-Member]

Still no sleep, not much point now. Too upset with myself for putting myself through the pain of them. Looking back, probably should have called someone. I think I need a new safety plan😥😥