I can’t cope

[Jynx]

Not too bad @Captain24 glad the sun has gone down!! Alright day at work for ya?

[Captain24]

I’m trying to change my attitude so instead of getting upset I’m trying to breathe through it or use my spiky ring @Jynx.Im trying self regulation! But some of it was rough. 

Is your day better now the sun has gone down? Or is it just your a night owl. 

I got out of work and checked my phone. I had a message from mum and all I could see was ‘look at your stupid dog!’ My first thought was what has Jett done. I just knew it was him. Then I opened it to this

 

[Jynx]

@Captain24 SO PROUD!! Spiky ring for the win!! 

Haha yeah I even got out to go for a little barefoot run just on sunset!! It was a bit much tho I came home completely red in the face and my nose burning.... I think from being in dry air con alllll day then suddenly running (and thus breathing heavily) in the really humid air. I had a lil sneezathon and everything hahaha

OMG WHAT A FUNKY LIL NOODLE AHAHAHA LOOK AT HIMMMMM

lol at first I thought the patterns on the floor were patches of drool!

Silly little pupper 🤣😍

[Captain24]

I’m trying super doopa hard @Jynx Even on my drive to and from. I get stuck behind a car and my skin gets all prickly and my chest hurts so I’m trying to say to myself ‘my healthy adult self is trying to keep me safe’ I’ve also been trying the 5 senses thing that I hate! I haven’t done anything risky for 2 days. As hard as it is though, I’m trying to be mindful of others on the road. 

I don’t know how you barefoot run. I put things on just to walk to the clothesline. I am allergic to grass though. Heavy breathing ment you got your heart pumping! 

He is a little bit cute!!! 

I have another funny Jett story. We were in bed the other day and he started to growl. It was his scared growl. He was looking down the hall and half way done was something laying in the middle of the floor. He got really ‘brave’ and jumped off the bed. He slowly walked to it, I’m talking, inch by inch. He got close to it and ‘bravely’ kept going. Still really tentative and growling his scared growl. It was his humping teddy! He had to get so close before he realised! I just laughed at him! 

[Jynx]

@Captain24 omg yes, and isn't it soooo hard at first lol 😅 So dw totally normal - also totally normal to hate and resent the process ahaha 

I remember when I started affirmations in the mirror I'd be SOOOO resistant - fully dragging my feet lol I HATED it. Now I do it so much I don't even notice 😋

Took a few months to develop the calluses haha but I will happily info-dump to you about it another time if you're curious!! 

OMG hahaha getting suss on the humping teddy, as if he wouldn't wine and dine it if he had the chance 🤣 Ahahaha you cracked me up, great way to end my work day!! Hehe ty! Nighty night wonderful one, I shall see you anon! 😊💜

[Captain24]

It’s horrible but I’m trying really hard. I have tried before but now it seems different. Maybe a switch has flipped or maybe it’s my psych and I’m kinda getting it better. I don’t know @Jynx I defs can’t do affirmations that’s just pushing it too far. This self regulation shit will take some time, I need to try and stick to it. 

I really don’t get the barefoot running. That’s why they invented joggers! What if you step on glass or anything? I stepped on a cat head in my house last night and it hurt, it was in deep and I had to pull it out. My feet are too sensitive. 

When he started jumping he would jump everything but I gently said ‘no Jett’ but when he started jumping this teddy i let him go for it. So now it’s the only thing he jumps and I’m totally ok with that, better than those horrible dogs that hump everything thing and everyone. 

I hope you had a good sleep and have a good day. 

Im working tonight and tomorrow night so I won’t be around. I may come on when I wake up but not sure if I’ll have time. Depends on how long it takes me to get ready. 

If not I’ll see you Monday. 

[Jynx]

@Captain24 Ayyyy look at you go, making progress in recovery! Isn't it just so confusing? 🤣

BUT!! Things do get clearer and clearer! I dunno if it will help you as well but I learned about the 'stages of competence' which helped me heaps! Goes like this: 

1. Unconscious Incompetence (You don't know that there is a gap in knowledge/lack of a skill)
2. Conscious Incompetence (You're aware of the gap in knowledge. Now learning the new skill can begin)
3. Conscious Competence (You must put conscious mental effort into performing the new skill - you are practicing)
4. Unconscious Competence (The skill is now 'second nature' and you can perform it effortlessly)

So like, you're reaching number 3 with these skills now, where you are actively putting them into place, but you're still needing to put a lot of concentrated mental effort into the process. This also goes for like, how the skills then effect us - ie. you're consciously competent at being soothed by them, but they still don't feel automatic. 

Know what I've found to be the number one way to move from stage 3 to stage 4? Consistency. Doesn't matter if you half-ass the process so long as you're assing it in some way! Doesn't matter if you miss a day or two or six! You can pick it back up again and keep on doing it. 

You... stepped on a CAT HEAD? Made of Lego I hope!! Ouch!! 

I have totally gotten a smidge of glass in my foot before lol but it didn't really hurt cos once your calluses get super thick, the glass never reaches the nerve layer 😅 I do barefoot for my back pain actually!! So like, your ankles are your body's natural suspension/shock absorbtion system right? When we run in heel-strike form (ie. heel hits the ground first) the shock of your body hitting the ground runs straight up the back of the ankle through to the spine. Whereas when I run barefoot my body naturally wants to run in toe-strike form - and when the balls of the feet hit the ground first, it absorbs most of the shock before your heel hits the ground, thereby protecting the spine from being like, constantly jostled about!! 

Also, I cannot tell you why, but running barefoot feels SO DIFFERENT to how I used to feel when running. It used to feel like a chore, a great slog of pain and soreness. But now it's like.... idk, feels really freeing! Like I am running with whimsy in my heart, and a literal spring in my step!! Cos I also skip (which is also much better on your back in terms of shock, AND burns more energy than running!) teeheehee 😋

Aye I will never understand people who just... let their dogs go and hump people's legs and stuff! And just casually say like 'Oh don't mind Roger he just likes you' 

NO ROGER I DO NOT WANT YOUR LIL DOGGY CROTCH ON MY ANKLE TYVM 🤣

I hope you're surviving work okay hun!! Take care of your wonderful self and maybe catch ya tomorrow? 💜

[tyme]

Heya @Captain24 ,

How are you, my friend?

[tyme]

Hope you're not working TOOOO hard @Captain24  🙂