I get it now addictions

[Judymay]

I get it  now. I am A social worker, worked with many people addicted to things and I finally get it. This system is broken, what do you do when you've tried literally every angle for help and used all your tools to cope and still feel like you're not safe? What do you do then? You turn to a drink or an oil that helps you escape reality and gives you relief so you don't feel the pain and feeling like giving up for a moment. Surely that is not a bad thing right?? Are addictions dangerous? Absolutely. But what else do you do when you've tried literally have tried every method and help has not come. It's my only relief, my escape from self harm cos a small part of me hopes this will one day be over. It's hope really and survival. I don't even know why I'm here. I'm probably not in a good place and just splitting out rubbish but that's where I'm at. I'm feeling okay cos I've taken things to take the pain away and for a minute I don't feel the pain, the rejection. Life feels sustainable. I get it now. All this time. These people aren't quitters they have I'm sure tried every turn and this broken system has let them down so they are doing the only job hung to survive and survive is paramount! That is all and how do you fault someone for just trying to stop drowning? Does this make any sense? I don't know, I may not be in the best state and just talking trash but I'm here trying to do my best to stay alive for the future hope of better, future of help maybe? I don't even know anymore, we just seeing what will evolve I guess. 

[Unfurling]

❤️ My heart genuinely goes out to you as a social worker ❤️ Burnout is real. The system is working against you, and frankly everyone. I hear that you are doing your best and trying your hardest, and I think it's brave of you to say what you've said. Our human spirits don't come in system sizes.

[Judymay]

Thank you @Unfurling  I also found I have asd level 2 this week and have read about autism burnout and wander why I ever went into that field as it always sucked me dry as an empath. And now being on the other side and engaging them o find they fall short of what I gave and I am actually ashamed to say I did that role. I also have identified the funding is only getting smaller and options for help decreasing so I can only imagine the role is just disappointing telling people no we don't have anything. I can't even imagine. Well actually I can cos now I have stopped asking for help cos I feel bad watching people try to only find nothing and feel bad for others to feel that defeat but yes I would probably not go there again.

[Unfurling]

It saddens me to hear the state of these things as you describe it as if anyone would know it would be you after being in the role. I'm not originally from Australia, I'm actually from the USA and when I first arrived here 23 years ago I thought to myself 'Wow!' as all the social support seemed so superior to what I was used to back home. But I feel like I've seen it decline before my very eyes over the years. Unrecognisable, I would say. I feel like community is so important, we have to focus on our communities and our spheres of influence and spread love when and where we can because we can't expect that people are doing okay under these circumstances. I'm so glad you are finding out more about yourself and how your brain works, that sounds like it's already provided some validation for you as to why it was not the field for you. ❤️