Living with DID : being diagnosed

[BraveOne]

Thanks so much for speaking a little about your experiences around diagnosis n seeking help @Maggie  I've been thinking to delete my post as it took a while for anyone to respond. It's scary speaking about this in a public place... That's why l chose my name here brave one
Your story sounds like mine, back then there was no real support or understanding and l too just tried to figure it out.
I feel life all these years on and off the focus in therapy has been around depression, anxiety, ptsd however never with anyone that has understood or knew how to be with the dissociation or could help really. It's good now over 20years later it's been brought up again for me to face and lve finally found some real help in the right area.

Glad to hear you're working with the social worker and have some support in your life too

[Maggie]

@BraveOne  Some of the problems I encountered, were some psychiatrists believed it existed, while others did not. That was when others things seemed more important, like depression anxiety and all the other attachments.

I’ve done a lot of reading and research myself. I have found a very helpful sight that might help you also. pods-online.org.uk. The lady running it has worked through DID, I should say , is working through DID. Carolyn Spring. Her books are helpful, but challenging. I would only recommend reading them with a therapist. They bring up a lot of stuff.

There are a lot of us, ( my internal family),  embarrassing really. I’m poly fragmented. I don’t say much about my diagnosis, it’s tricky and really difficult to explain. My counsellor is a gem, nothing fazes her. They need to be really for anything, because they certainly won’t be disappointed.

I’m happy to chat anytime I’m online. I’ve been off for a few days. Depression can get tricky, and the overactive mind. 🥺🥺

Take care.❣️❣️

[BraveOne]

@Maggie so appreciate this resource you've shared. I had a quick look last night and it's helped me clarify what lm needing right now. It's great to see there's an org that's focused on educational matetial and support.

It's interesting to hear your experiences as mine have been similar around people believing DID exists or not... The focus for any therapy has aiways been basic : depression, anxiety. It was safer to speak of ptsd. And l did try EMDR when it first came about however l wasn't a willing participant so we faked it as the Doc was so scary we just had to get outta there . 20 years later, curiously l consulted the same psychiatrist and she still didn't believe in dissociation.

My recent decision to find a therapist who had experiences around working with DID was a year long adventure of interviewing many and waiting patiently for One to show up that had the skills, curiosity, warmth, empathy and stillness that could be besides me and hold all lm holding. It's early days yet lm willing to give it a go for now.

See you around the forum.
I hope you find some peace from your busy mind

[Maggie]

It took me a long time too @BraveOne . Finding someone with the patience to let us learn to find a comfortable space. It’s a very long a slow process, or it has been for me. Trying to come to terms with “ my life”, as lived through others is scary. I so often doubt my memories, another way of dissociating I think. But being heard and believed by someone is such a gift. Often she holds the memories, until I can find a way to hold them myself.

It’s worth a go. 

I’ll leave some threads you might like to have a look at, and meet some others here.

Nice to chat. You are welcome to chat anywhere. 💕

Good Morning 

The safe room- somewhere to just come and sit.... offload... feel supported 

Daily goals, motivation and check in 

Saturday Soiree - all welcome!! 

SUNDAY FUNDAY 

[BraveOne]

@Maggie
Yess being heard and believed is such a gift.

Piecing together many moments of my life that l haven't lived yet have been lived by my body is weird yet necessary.

Finding spaces to be and places to be with others
Thanks for the links to other places on the forum.

[Maggie]

@BraveOne  You might like to have a look at this also. HAVOCA - Help for Adult Victims of Child Abuse . 

Take care. 💜💜💕💕

[BraveOne]

Thanks so much @Maggie

[Grace20212]

Hi my name is Grace, I am 22 years old. I have just been diagnosed with DID and to be completely honest I am feeling really quite scared and overwhelmed by it all. All this new information and talk about alters and co consciousness etc. Like I live in a household which is creating a large amount of trauma in my life still and I am still trying to process all of that and now this. I have been in hospitals many times but they always just diagnose me with BPD which I never felt was right, but my psychologist I have who I have been seeing for 6+ years acknowledges my trauma and tells me I have C-PTSD which honestly feels like a more correct diagnosis. But is it stupid that I feel like I am just making everything up and lying even though I know I am not. I have always just reffered to myself to others as grace and never gone by any other names or "alters identies" but interanlly I know there are many people who take control when I cannot be there anymore if that makes any sense. But to others they don't notice a difference. I am just all confused and scared and overwhelmed and I don't know where to look or talk to about this and it just doesn't all feel real and I don't even know what I am  meant to do about it all.

[Jynx]

@Grace20212 first off welcome to the forums, I'm one of the moderators just here to say hi.

I'm sorry to hear that things are such a struggle for you right now, but it's really good you're reaching out. A new diagnosis like this can be really scary and confusing, but you've come to a great place to find acceptance and understanding. You're definitely not alone in your feelings.

Feel free to reach out to us if you have any questions or concerns - you can tag a moderator by typing @ followed by the word moderator and selecting it from the drop down menu. Hope you're able to find some connection and support here

[BraveOne]

Dear @Grace20212 

Ive just seen your post as I havent been on here for a long while. Thanks for speaking so honestly about your expereince of being diagnosed. Im so pleased someone was able to respond when you posted . Wondering how you are doing now.... Yesss its scary when we dont know how everything is put together inside and finding ways of understanding that feel right is important to me too. 

thoughts of this diagnosis at times make sense at other times not as I just want to be "normal" and I  think Im kinda messed up having DID yet im affected every day and unsure how to or who to talk about these things inside that I judge as strange ways of being,