Tips for when seeing the Management Team

[MsManaged]

My daughter has been hospitalised for a little over two weeks now. 

They've altered & changed her medication. 

I've still not really been told an official diagnosis. Though PTSD is most often referred to & she did mention the drs believe she was wrongly diagnosed as a child with ODD & its more likely Aspergers Syndrome. There are other circumstances as well obviously that has her suffering PTSD.

Anyway.... the drs finally called me to set up an appointment in regards to a "management plan".

Which sounds like they are getting ready to discharge her. Would have liked them to talk to me about a few things first but it is what it is. 

I've never been through this particular situation before & I'm hoping some of you can give me some ideas of questions I should ask. 

Also if I strongly feel their management ideas are not going to work or I'm not ready to have her home what are some of the best ways & words to use to possibly convince them? 

Hope the above makes sense. 

Thanks  

[Krishna]

Hi @MsManaged  It’s great you are being involved in the management plan for your daughter and am sure her diagnosis will be thoroughly explained to you during the meeting. If they plan to discharge her back into your care, make sure you express clearly any concerns you have with this. I know the mental health system advocate that family is crucial for a patients recovery/care but that isn’t always the case and your own mental health should be a priority also. It’s hard at this point to suggest questions for the team, not knowing their management plan but simply speak from the heart and don’t be afraid to ask a lot of questions if you need to. From my own experience I have found them willing to hear your point of view and take it into consideration. Am hoping all goes well for you and your daughter. ❤️

[MsManaged]

Thanks @Krishna you've actually put my mind a bit more at ease. 

I'm sure my daughter feels (wants) ready to come home but I'd like more done at home before she arrives. 

I know there will be bumps in the road but I'd like the coming home be a bit of fresh start. With rooms organised & tidy. 

While she's managed for 2 weeks without her 2 or 3 rooms of 'stuff' I know she misses it but I don't want her overwhelmed by what she left behind. I also know I probably shouldn't be cleaning up after her either! 

I've done 18 loads of washing so far (9kg machine) with at least 3 more than go. And yes there was clothes already in wardrobes of hers. And yes all that washing was hers.

I've just started bringing out make up & craft to sort/filter. 

I've taken photos to show the management team because sometimes there just aren't enough words to describe the hoarding/mess! 

Again thank you @Krishna 

[Krishna]

Oh @MsManaged I can so relate. My daughters room used to be absolute chaos. Could barely open the door at times with stuff everywhere. Those were the days where she’d float in and out of our life for months at a time. She’d leave and I’d clean and wash and scrub and fold and put everything away. She’d return and it would start all over again. My psychologist at the time suggested I pack in boxes the majority of “stuff”, store in the shed and just leave the basics in her room. This helped a lot. Good luck with the meeting and don’t forget to breathe ❤️

[Former-Member]

Hi @MsManaged 

I'm TuxedoCat, one of the peer support workers here 😊 

It sounds like there is so much happening, especially when this is new. I'm glad you've come to the forums. And thanks to @Krishna for sharing your story and sending support ❤️ 

It's also clear that you love your daughter so much and want the best for her ❤️ It must be a big job going through everything, but it sounds like you're making the space so much more comfortable for her. 

Also, I'm very forgetful. So I find it useful to write things down before meetings like this so I don't forget. You might find this useful too ❤️ 

This sounds like a big time! Do you have some things in place to care for yourself too? 

big hugs, 
TuxedoCat

[MsManaged]

Thank you @Former-Member  I actually have started to make notes.

Eg: official diagnosis? 

Respite care while I'm away? (I have a 3wk trip coming up) 

What are the side effects of medication & if X doses are missed? 

And so on. 

Again sincere thanks to all  🙂 

[Former-Member]

You're doing great @MsManaged. Those notes sound great ❤️ 

[MsManaged]

@Former-Member thanks  🙂 

The appt was cancelled due majority of staff off sick. I did tell them I was a teeny bit snuffly. So they told my daughter I cancelled the appt because I was sick. She was already having a bad day so that didn't help as she knows I have COPD. Good one Doc! 

My daughter then rang back later (having a very bad day) telling me they will call tomorrow to set up another appt & they plan to discharge her Friday even though she's feeling even more like harming herself & still having side effects from new meds. 

And not once have they attempted to discuss anything with me.  From my mental health, especially now I know more & I don't think I'm coping. Nor the impact she's had on the household & etc etc. 

Now I want to punch walls. 

Rant over ..   for now. 

[Former-Member]

Hi @MsManaged,

My name is Sirius, and I'm one of the new peer support workers here at SANE, it's nice to meet you. 🙂

I can hear that you’ve had a hard time today – and it sounds like you're going above and beyond to support your daughter. It's a real shame the staff miscommunicated the reason why you couldn't come in today, which may have compounded things further for you.

I’d like to acknowledge the courage it takes to open up and share your feelings here with the community, as well as acknowledging them within yourself. If you’re open to the suggestion, it might help to reach out to those in your circle you feel comfortable talking to i.e. other friends and family, a trusted GP or a mental health worker, such as a counsellor to help provide you with some further support.

If you’re open to a 1-on-1 chat with a counsellor the SANE help centre is open from 10am-10pm Mon-Fri and the number is: 1800 187 263. All our counsellors are trained to provide a non-judgemental and confidential session with the opportunity to explore your challenges and provide strategies for longer-term help.

Please go gently with yourself @MsManaged 

Take care,
Sirius✨

[MsManaged]

Thanks @Former-Member for the welcome & words of encouragement, empathy & empowerment. 

Just last my chiro (who is a student) suggested going across the open hallway where the counselling office was to see if they took self referrals. She wasn't sure if you had to be a student at the Uni. 

Turns out you don't have to be a student! They are going to organise appt for me starting next semester & for free. While the are qualified counsellors since they are going for post graduate courses they are considered students hence the discount (or free if have financial difficulties). 

That was probably more information than needed. I'm just avoiding going back to look in another box of junk. 

Thanks again @Former-Member @Former-Member @Krishna & everyone else here.