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Something’s not right

ucancallmebetty
Contributor

have run out of ideas

Hi. Just wondering if anyone has some idea where I could take my 20 year old daughter to meet people around her own age in small groups. My daughter has severe anxiety disorder and many other problems. She has been very isolated and confined to the home for about 5 years now. Basically her only contact with the outside world is when I drive her around in the car each day. We do challenges when things are good like stepping out of the car and walking a few steps and some days are better than others.We do get out to a few regular places when it is not too crowded but she has no interaction with anyone other than myself and brother. Have tried many things over the years but not many people understand her situation and when she is unable to talk or look up from the ground interaction becomes very uncomfortable for others. I work all week but their doent seem to be anything on weekends or afternoons for me to take her to. Public transport for her on her own is out of question. She is very smart but was unable to complete school due to anxiety. She is terrified of Doctors due to past experience so can not get her to any. I know she is very brave and wants things to change but I cant find anyone that does small group interactions. I think if she was involved in something that is just about having fun and not talking about her anxiety it would really make a difference. Is there anything on the central coast  that anyone knows about that fits my daughters situation?

16 REPLIES 16

Re: have run out of ideas

Hi,
I wonder if there would be local people in your community who could give lessons on a particular hobby like crochet, candle making, soap making. At a local craft market i went to ages ago i over heard a lady offering lessons to a different customer - possibly could be one to one or eventually small group. I used to go to the local library when i was struggling to get out. not too many people and when i went semi regularly it became a safer feeling place.

Re: have run out of ideas

thanks. I have tried to get her into activities like art but she feels she is not good at anything. Many of these groups are either for very young or elderly. Not many options for 20 somethings. Have tried library but as she gets everything online she doesn't understand the point of a library and again no one in there her age group that would allow her to develop a friendship. Thanks for your response and thoughts though. All ideas welcome

Re: have run out of ideas

@ucancallmebetty  Hi ucancallmebetty have you tried for a ndis package? I think it would be worth while giving it a go. It wont be easy and you might have to try several times but if you got a package you could organize workers your daughters age to come and take her out places or even just drives to begin with. 

 

Being amongst a worker her own age would be so beneficial. My daughter has chronic depression and was recently granted a ndis package and has a female worker her age and it is wonderful. greenpeax

Re: have run out of ideas

oh how I wish I could get her on NDIS. I have tried several times and with support but they just keep asking for more information. Her psychologist wrote that having treating anxiety disorders for over 20 years she was the worst he had ever met and very unlikely to recover but they still knocked her application back. I wish they could tell me where to get her cured as they said it wasn't life long, She has been unable to speak since 5 when going to school other than me and my brother yet they still say she doesn't meet criteria. I have resigned that I will be looking after her for the rest of my life but I keep trying to find someway to get her to interact with people but no one seems to do anything for young adults except if they have NDIS so Im really struggling to find anything for her

Re: have run out of ideas

@ucancallmebetty  I have posted an article on the Live Experience Forum about making friends which was on the abc online news website earlier today which you might find interesting. greenpeax

Re: have run out of ideas

hello @ucancallmebetty@Millieme@greenpea 

wondering how you are doing 

sending you hugs and letting you know we are here for you Heart

Re: have run out of ideas

thanks I will check it out

Re: have run out of ideas

Thanks. We are good. Actually my daughter has been practicing social isolation all her life so she feels quite comfortable. We were thinking of trying to go on a short train trip as there is no one on them now. As long as she doesn't listen or watch news anxiety is under control. Thanks for asking it is nice to know there are people who understand

Re: have run out of ideas

hi@ucancallmebetty I would suggestboard game meetups. There's no social pressure you  just play boardgames  You don't have to talk unless to say yahtzee. A lot of young people do this. It's very popular and there are a lot of misfits (in a good way.) shy types and eccentric types. My son can be a bit stiff with his peers. He's had friends but they are potheads. He's agreed to go but unfortunatly with the shutdown I don't know when the meetups will start again. Good luck. I'm sure she is a lovely girl she just needs a little nudge as does my son. You are not alone in this.

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