Thoughts

[Lilly6]

Thank you @Eve7  I have been reaching out for support but essentially I have made my decision. 

[Eve7]

@Lilly6 Please think of something else to do right now. I am able to sit with you and listen. You are precious and valuable and many of us here will support you. This is not your time.

I am having a shower now as I find the hot water helps wash away negative thoughts and then I will be here sitting in my garden with you. ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[Lilly6]

Thank you for sitting with me @Eve7  I appreciate it. I am feeling so bad and mixed up right now and just want it to end. 

[Eve7]

I can understand that you want it to end @Lilly6 as I have been there. Depression is horrible and I am sorry the meds aren’t helping. I think that too sometimes so that is when I eat chocolate. The sun is shining here and the birds are singing...lucky birds without a care in the world. Can you hear the birds sing for a moment?

i can stay with you. 💙🧡💙

[Otter]

Hi @Lilly6 ,

I'm sorry that you are still grappling with urges to SH at the moment, that sounds tricky to manage and I know it's a challenging time for you. I'm glad to see you are still posting on the Forums and chatting with our helpful and lovely members.

Are you able to do something enjoyable for yourself this afternoon, like taking a long walk and grabbing a coffee, immersing yourself in some work, doing your nails/nail care routine or reaching out to chat to someone?

Here with you always with the whole Forums community,

Otter

[Lilly6]

Thank you @Eve7  I appreciate it. Sadly I cannot hear birds singing as I am at work 😞 Yes depression is awful 

[NatureLover]

I don't have many words this morning, but can sit with you in your pain and despair also, @Lilly6 ...

[Lilly6]

Thank you @Eve7 , @NatureLover, @Otter and @Anastasia . I really appreciate your kind words and sitting with me. You are wonderful people. I am going to go away and consider everything now. If you see me here next week you will know I did not end my life. I still am leaning towards it though as I can't see any other way out of this. 💜

[NatureLover]

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@Lilly6 wrote:

I am going to go away and consider everything now. If you see me here next week you will know I did not end my life.

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I really, really hope to see you here next week, @Lilly6 ...I hope in your considering that you can find some spark of hope and reason to live. I hope you have a good weekend, with some improvement and some good rest...I will be thinking of you lots, and sending good vibes and good wishes in your direction. We care about you and what happens to you 

[Anastasia]

Oh @Lilly6 I am crying for your pain.

I don't know you but I would truly be sad if something happens to you. Please dig deep. I too had similar thoughts a few weeks back. I know you're hurting and it sucks and I know it feels endless but there are still so many beautiful moments/years for you to experience. You have good years ahead, this is a moment in time hun. We are all here for you 😘❣️