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Something’s not right

Coco87
New Contributor

Separated from husband with ?PTSD &paranoid delusions

My husband has had signs of PTSD for a couple of years. Worse last year with some aggression and increased drinking. His family are in denial. He refused to regularly see any psychiatrist or psychologist and is now only seeing a counsellor. He is paranoid that I am trying to hurt him and now we are separated. He is fighting for full custody of our baby and his family are believing his delusions that I have been hitting him. It is a nightmare and the mental health teams are not doing the proper checks. He lied and told them he is seeing a psychologist and they believed him. This then was told in court so the Judge assumed he is fine. I know he drinks a lot and it's the paranoia and hallucinations that make me scared for our baby girl. What if he is looking after her and has dangerous hallucinations again? I can't believe a child is at risk and my husband is wanting to separate because of things which never happened..... Has anyone been through this and how do things pan out? He seems to have had signs of psychosis about 4 times last year. Will it eventually become obvious to everyone he is unwell? How do I get the Mental health team to do a thorough assessment?

3 REPLIES 3

Re: Separated from husband with ?PTSD &paranoid delusions

Hey there @Coco87 firstly I am sorry no one has responded to your post yet, hopefully my reply here will bump it up within our community landing page and other members of the forums will jump in and provide some insight from their own experience.

 

I just want you to know you are not alone in this journey and we are all here to listen Heart I am sorry about the experience you are having with your husband, I don't doubt this will be very stressful and emotionally exhausting. I think it's incredibly positive that you are keeping your baby and your own welfare at the forefront of your mind. Regardless of your husbands diagnosis, it is very important you are both safe as you navigate this journey with him. I would encourage you to get in touch with our SANE Help Centre here for some extra info, they will be able to provide you more tailored support and direct resource. A few of our members should jump in soon with some ideas too. Do you see your own counsellor or therapist? This can be really beneficial too, especially when the family aren't coming around to the changes in his behaviour.

 

How are you travelling since posting? Hope to hear from you soon.

Re: Separated from husband with ?PTSD &paranoid delusions

I am extremely anxious as my baby will be with my husband alone on Sunday night. This has never happened before but the judge ruled it. My baby will be hysterical as we co-sleep after being taught how to do this safely, and she is 2. He still hasn't seen a clinical psychologist or psychiatrist for thorough assessments or treatment. I am just horrified that Judges put kids at such risk without reviewing all the evidence. It seems that whoever has the best most expensive legal team gets what they want and the poor child suffers. I am seeing my own psychologist and have lots of support but would appreciate any tips from others how to cope being away from my babygirl overnight as well as trying not to have such bad anxiety about her safety that I don't sleep all night.... He drinks alcohol too and I have no way of knowing if she will be ok. He is a deep sleeper, sleep walks and hallucinates with his own mental illness....

Re: Separated from husband with ?PTSD &paranoid delusions

Hi @Coco87 , 

i'm sorry you are going through this with your partner. Im sort of in the same boat but we are still together, well sort of. Child protection got involved with our case because he voluntarily rang the cat team 2 days after recovering from an episode of psychosis. we have an 8 month old baby. 

I suggest just to check on them from time to time during their contact, but that can be a double edged sword as he may think youre keeping tabs on him and make things worse. 
Child protection is good for your baby but they will grill not just your paranoid partner but also you (sadly). So they should be your last resort. 

Your partner will eventually start showing signs to everyone in time. It took months for my partner to act his delusional self and it happened with his mom so it was good that someone else told him he was acting off that wasnt me. 
My heart goes out to you. They can mask it really well for some time. He was assessed after a drug induced psychosis in 2018 and when the cat team came he said i hit him and made him do drugs. Smiley LOL

If he gets really bad you can call the mental health triage team and they can give him a ring. Some nurses are really good and dont buy into the gaslighting. 
i hope your situation has gotten better now & your baby safe. 

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