Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[Bax]

My son has ( I think) Narcissistic Personality Disorder and has cut himself off from the family and is very isolated. He hasn’t spoken or responded to text messages or phone calls from me, his mother, for 2 years. He has issues with drugs and alcohol and also has eating issues. He does see some members of our extended family ( his cousin) occasionally… he occasionally calls my daughter but she finds this exhausting and frustrating.  He has many delusions about the past , insisting that we made him leave the family home during the first Covid lockdown…. This is completely untrue, he was renting a unit at the time and had 6 months to go on a 12 month lease.  He currently holds down a job that has always been a work from home environment although he has big issues with his colleagues and employer snd recently accused them of bullying which he threatened legal action.  We have tried to get him help but it’s so difficult to find the right therapist and impossible now as he had cut us off. He constantly threatens suicide . I just am at my wits end and don’t know where to go from here …

[hanami]

Hi @Bax 

Welcome to the forums! It's so courageous of you to reach out and share such a personal story about your son and what he and your family are going through. I'm sure you will find a supportive and caring community here that will be able to relate to your experience. 

As a mother of four adult children I can imagine the turmoil you are going through being so worried about your son. I can also imagine how helpless you must feel that your son has cut you himself off from a family that obviously loves him so much. 

Do you have a mental health professional you can talk to about the situation? Not only about your son but about the impact this is having on your own mental health?

hanami💮

[Bax]

Yes. I have seen a psychologist to assist me in coping with the situation and when my son was in contact I organised a psychiatrist to see him but after a year my son said it was unhelpful. He has tried one other psychiatrist but that was also not the right person for him( he said).  I know he sees a GP that he likes but I worry about his substance abuse and his ability to be honest about that . My daughter saw him recently and was observed first hand the level of alcohol and drug abuse which she found very confronting   I’m not sure if it’s the problem in itself or if it is a means of self medication.  Chicken or egg?

[hanami]

Gosh it's heartbreaking isn't it.

They often go hand in hand - mental health issues and drugs and alcohol. 

I hope others can help with ideas of how to deal with the situation.

hanami 💮