I can’t cope

[Captain24]

That just tipped me over the edge

[Jynx]

@Captain24 aye would be alienating hun, but like most things it can be worked on.

Aiight hun I am about to head off, but do me a solid - take some time to slow, focus your breath, centre yourself. You KNOW you don't deserve to feel this way. You do NOT deserve to be punished for having a normal human reaction to extremely traumatising circumstances. There's no such thing as a 'good' or 'bad' child, because that reduces us to simplistic concepts. Humans are far messier than that. You're doing the best you can with what you've been given, and you're doing far better than you give yourself credit for. You will be okay, I have faith in you. 

Big love, big hugs, and I will catch you next time darlin 💜🫂

[Captain24]

All I have managed today is change my sheets. I don’t have it in me to clean my house. I hate that I’m so fat and lazy.

Im a bad dog mum as I slept through breakfast and haven’t fed them 

Im such a horrible person. I don’t deserve to be here. They would be better off if I went. 

[RiverSeal]

Hey @Captain24 sitting with you and your thoughts today. I'm sure the doggos will love it if you feed them. RiverSeal 

[Captain24]

Hey @RiverSeal 

How are you? 

Haven't seen you around recently. 

My thoughts are really deep and dark today. My anxiety is through the roof. It just feels like a struggle. 

I feel extreme guilt for not giving them breakfast. Pix has had lunch and Jett is slowly eating his. 

[RiverSeal]

Hey @Captain24 

I had a family emergency and had to take leave for a month and then I got and ear infection which I'm still recovering from. It's good to be back at work though and I really missed it.

What do you think you can do to manage your anxiety today?

Glad you feed the dogs!

RiverSeal 

[Captain24]

Sorry about your emergency I hope everything is ok.. @RiverSeal 

An ear infection doesn’t sound good. I have never had one so I don’t know what it’s like. 

I’ve finished all the arts and crafts that I’ve been doing and wasn’t going to get anything else out. Christmas is at my house so I need to have it tidy. But I think I should get some Lego out otherwise I’m just going to sit in the lounge and stare at a blank tv screen. 

Other than that I don’t know what to do. Everything just feels way too much and out of my capacity for today. 

If Lego doesn’t help I should probably head to my safety plan before things get too far out of control. 

[RiverSeal]

Sounds like a great plan @Captain24! Let's go for the Lego and reassess how you are going later. What about taking the dogs for a walk? RiverSeal 

[Captain24]

I can’t take the dogs for a walk around my estate. There’s been at least 4 snakes spotted in the last 2 days. One 10 metres from my back fence. @RiverSeal. Plus the walking track in town has snakes living under it. This is what happens when you live in the country! 

Im just making myself something to eat in the hope that it shifts something. 

[Captain24]

Eating didn’t help. All I did was burn my tongue, now it’s really painful. @RiverSeal 

I’ve got a Lego kit out but can’t face doing it. I’ve lost every last piece of energy or motivation. 

I have nothing left. I feel like nothing. 

My head space is really really dark.