Help please

[Me123]

My partner died a month ago and i'm spiralling. Needing some help to not to self harm at the moment but don't know what to do to stop myself.  Today has been tough and I don't know if I can get through the night without self harming.  Unsure if posting here will help but thought I'd try it out.  

[outlander]

Hello @Me123 and welcome

Im so sorry for your loss.

Well done for reaching out here. A few suggestions would be:
-holding ice in your palms
-slapping an elastic band on your wrist
-drawing on yourself with a texta where you want to sh- you can make it gorey or pretty or write the names of those you love
-have a hot shower
- do some exercise
-go on a cleaning rampage till you settle
-colouring in, drawing or painting
- moisturising your skin
-call a helpline
-do some deep breathing


Most urges last 20 minutes so if you can ride thoe out it usually starts to subside

[utopia]

@Me123. I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine the pain you are going through. 

I'm glad you reached out here. I'll ask @NikNik  to see if she can post links to threads on the forum that have advice on how to avoid self harming. 

It might also be helpful to reach out to your GPS, psychologist or psychiatrist.

[Mulgajane]

Hi @Me123

I used to self harm.

Three things that come to mind are;

Many cultures self harm to deal with grief (remember the scene in the movie Rabbit Proof Fence when the women had their children stolen?)  - you are not alone.

Keep away from anything that will do permanent damage. Your body is innocent - like a child - be as gentle as you possibly can.

I have developed a new relationship with my body - step by step. It involves going outside a lot. Walking - breathing - listening to sound. 

[Me123]

I feel really stuck.  I know all the things I should be doing but can't seem to manage making good healthy choices.  I feel like no one understands anymore.  I'm worried I'll eventually hate my life so much that I'll really hurt myself.  I'm scared.  

[Shaz51]

Hello @Me123 and welcome to the forum '

thank you for reaching out , sending you lots of tender hugs and letting you know you are not alone

we are here for you 24/ 7 someone is here always ready to have a talk , take one day , one step at a time , @Former-Member are here to talk to on the chatline and helpline

keep sharing and keep in touch my friend xx

[Former-Member]

Sounds like things are feeling really full on at the moment @Me123. Good on you for reaching out to the forums for support. I can see that one of our moderators has sent you an email with some contact detials for some support services. As a reminder, if you ever want to talk more about how you're feeling or you're worried about harming yourself, please contact Lifeline on 13 11 14. Take care of yourself today 🌻

[Former-Member]

Hey @utopia. Just replying to your tag for @NikNik to recommend this coping strategy thread. It's not specific to self harm however there are a lot of great strategies there worth a read over  🍁 Reaching out to face to face support is a really important step too 🐼