Despair *potential trigger: abuse*

[CherryBomb]

@hiddenite 

Thanks for taking the time to respond to me individually, and others - that's very thoughtful.

It's horrible to feel pressured, and backed into a corner with no room to move. 

There's so much uncertainty with what's happening all right now, and I can understand that it can feel like the decision is out of your hands. While I can't know the CAT Team will decide, please know that this moment in your life will pass, even though it feels like it's stuck, you will eventually move pass this all. Look at the things you can control right now, even if it's the little things: Breathing, taking one step at a time, distracting yourself.

I see that you are finding questions are welcome distractions, so I will ask some if I may 

- What's in your fridge? 

- Can you make yourself something to eat?

- What can you do around the house to relax you? Got any DVDs? Enjoy watching any television shows?

Keep writing, keep sharing, stay strong

You got our shoulders to lean and/or cry on...

[Baboo]

Do you think having a little some thing to nibble might help?

Do you have the house to your self?

[hiddenite]

Cherry Bomb

I've had to move in with my parents. They tell me to toughen up, that they are ashamed of me for being in the MHU and that I'm pathetic.

I sit in my room

Don't want to be around them

Anxiety too bad to eat

Thanks for the shoulder but haven't cried for years. If I showed any emotions the abuse would be worse....

[Baboo]

cup of tea at least?

[hiddenite]

Parents are retired never go anywhere, that's why I spend most days in the car I just don't belong anywhere.

Can't manage the shops just avoid triggers

What a mess

Water with meds that's about it

[CherryBomb]

Your parents saying things like 'toughen up' is not helpful at all. No wonder you don't want to be around them. It sounds like your room feels like a safe place for you right now, and that's important. 

I think people who can let themselves be vulnerable are the strongest people. It takes real strength to be real and honest about how you're feeling. There's this Ted Talk that talkes about strength in vulnerablity. I've found it useful during some of my own struggles. Might also be a good outlet to distract you too. 

[Alessandra1992]

What helps me sometimes is scent, it can really shake my anxiety away if I use a strong smell to focus on..My personal favourite is the essential oil of grapefruit, and sometimes a sniff of sandalwood essential oil.
If you like to walk, my most favourite is sniffing roses or lavender or rosemary..and I snap off a piece of lavender or rosemary if it is overhanging a path..
Or, a drive to a beach and I open the windows and let the salty air into my lungs..
If you aren't able to eat right now, would you consider a cup of soup? I cheat and just use a TSP of stock powder in a cup..
I like the fact your GP is trying to help, it would be handy if he could recommend a non private option though.. Would you consider a PARC, prevention and recovery centre?

[hiddenite]

Don't feel safe anywhere.

Just feel so stupid going from 24 years of abuse back to my parents who are no support at all and make me feel worthless

[Baboo]

What time do your parents go to bed? Sneek out then and grab a cup of any thing warm- please. I think at least this will help your tummy.

Who wants to go through all this with a crook stomach at the same time.

[hiddenite]

I use essential oil all the time Instead of perfume I am triggered by a lot of smells so I use the essential oil to try and ground me.

I have never heard of PARC