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Anxiety about improving myself/getting help

Xerox-ofa-xero
Casual Contributor

Anxiety about improving myself/getting help

F (26)
My anxiety is at an all time high. My brain is so foggy and full of just paranoia and constant thoughts of self doubt. 

 

I’m so burnt-out from work and just life in general. I’m not caring for myself, drinking way too much. I go days without leaving the house and then when I do I get a wave of anxiety and paranoia. Everyone is looking at me, everyone is talking about me, even though I know they aren’t. My mind creates worst-case scenarios for everything I do. I’ve always felt like this, but now it’s worse. Drinking used to numb it but it’s only heightened the anxiety during and while I’m hungover. (I’m also trying to be sober.) 

I also don’t know where to start looking for help. Just leaving the house outside of my normal routine (of work and grocery shopping or a long walk) makes me anxious. I get worried that no one will believe me or that it will cost too much and in my mind I don’t have time, I have to work. I’ve tried to seek help before but I never really get far. I eventually convince myself I’m okay and then work and work to numb my brain until I get burntout again. This is a cycle that’s been happening for years. 

I have a lot of trauma from when I was a kid and teenager. And now I just feel like I’m regressing back to that fight or flight state even though I know I’m safe. 

I also feel so out of place. I know so many people who have anxiety and are on medication for it, but I start to freak out or tell them what I’m going through and they look at me as if I am strange. So I really don’t get it. 

 

I really want to improve on myself, focus on myself, but the idea of that is scary and ironically gives me anxiety. I just need to know where to start and if there are any short time (cost affordable) options to help me while I’m getting through this period of slowing down at work. 

6 REPLIES 6

Re: Anxiety about improving myself/getting help

Hi @Xerox-ofa-xero , Welcome to this supportive space. it must be hard living with this anxiety all the time. Do you have a doctor you can trust and share these things? 

Do you have friends or family to talk to?

Re: Anxiety about improving myself/getting help

Not really. I have one close friend and a partner but it’s hard to really express how it’s effecting me. And I struggle to find a good doctor/feel like I trust them enough.

Re: Anxiety about improving myself/getting help

Hi @Xerox-ofa-xero 

 

Firstly, good on you for reaching out here and for sharing what you've been going through. It's not an easy thing to do and takes quite a lot of courage.

It can be really overwhelming knowing where to start when getting help, I can see that now you're looking for some cost effective, more short-term supports, and also maybe something that isn't too time-consuming?

First off, I'm wondering if your workplace has an employee assistance program? That can be a really good option for free short-term support.

Next there are support lines, Beyond Blue is one that's coming to mind which may be suited to what you're going through, but we also have one here at SANE. These are places that offer brief support and can be a place that you can contact to get things off your chest, you may receive a few strategies to try, or you could also talk about some additional resources or supports that could help.

Then there are supports like MindSpot and MindStep, which are a bit more self-lead, but they also offer support from mental health workers as you go along

These are all free options, there are certainly more out there but I don't want to overwhelm you with resources right off the bat!

 

There's always going to be a way for us to talk ourselves out of getting help, tell ourselves maybe it's not that bad, or that others have it worse. If it's affecting your life then its significant and its okay to reach out.

Re: Anxiety about improving myself/getting help

Hi @Xerox-ofa-xero 

 

Welcome! It’s great to see you reaching out. You’ll always find support and encouragement here on the forums.

I’m sorry to hear anxiety is making daily life difficult. It takes strength to show up for work and make efforts to care for yourself. Taking long walks and aiming for sobriety are positive steps, they show your commitment to healing.

 

Sobriety is a journey, and having support can make a big difference. I found counselling helpful and used the free I Am Sober app, which offers goals and community support.
Visit I Am Sober - https://iamsober.com/en/site/home

 

For anxiety, the Mindspot Wellbeing Course helped me better understand and manage my symptoms. I also use the Smiling Mind app for mindfulness and meditation, which supports both anxiety management and sobriety.
Explore tools for anxiety - https://toolkit.lifeline.org.au/topics/anxiety/tools-apps-for-anxiety

 

Wishing you strength and hope on your journey. You’re not alone — we’re here to cheer you on.

 

Kindly Alisse

Re: Anxiety about improving myself/getting help

Out of everything I've read here this one resonates with me the most, I wish I had an answer or suggestion for you but I'm pretty much in the same boat. Just replied to show you're not alone. Hope things get better for you.

Re: Anxiety about improving myself/getting help

Hi @Whisperila, just wanted to say welcome to the forums.

I'm glad that you're finding others who you can relate to, and even further than that, that you've felt able to reach out to show solidarity and support. Glad to have you here 

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