moving into a sharehouse when you have a MI

[yinyang]

Hi everyone,

just wanted to ask other peoples advice about how to go about applying for and moving into a sharehouse when you have a mental illness.

I'm moving to a new place where there are better mental health services and just want to dedicate the next 3-6 months to health appoinments and building confidence to get back to work or study..

The thing that makes me anxious is I havent been working the last year+,have rarely socialized,nor partaken in any hobbies or interests and have just been getting through each day.How would one explain this to potential new housemates when asked 'So what do you do?'

Would you disclose this infomation upon meeting potential housemates for the first time?

I'm hoping to meet a household that is considerate and understanding but fear there may be stigma coming from some.

Any thoughts,advice or similiar experience would be welcomed.

Thanks and hope you're having a nice day

[greenpea]

@yinyang  Hi yinyang that is a tough one .... hmmmm .... I would be honest without dramatizing the situation too much. Alot depends on whether or not your symptoms are under control .... or could they impact on the running of the house like sharing chores etc?  

I always believe in honesty is the best policy as you are flat mates not best friends but you might need them one day to help you out if you are feeling poorly. More so you need them to understand if times are tough .... that is vital.

Thing is if you live together they are going to find out at some stage and speaking for myself I would prefer to know up front. greenpea

ps: I am sure there are those who will disagree

[Alacarte]

Hi @yinyang 

i’m living in a shared house now. I went from living by myself to living in a boarding house with 36 people in it. I was anxious and worried about what would come up, and for the first 2 months I didn’t say boo to anyone. I smoke, so I sat in the corner of the smoking area and just said hello if people approached me. I kept to myself and I really don’t think it bothered anyone. I found that people are generally too worried about there own lives to really care what the next guy is doing. This I have also found is only true in cities. In the country or remote locations like where I was bought up and lived till I was 30 life was hell. Everyone knew your sh!t. 

After a couple of months I started to talk to a couple of people who seemed ok to me from my observations. That ended up going well and at the end of my stay (5 months) I was comfortable. I mentioned my illness to one person there and that was because he was now a friend. You don’t have to open up to anyone and I don’t think many will care if you do your own thing. Stay in your room if that helps and use the kitchen as needed. Stay cordial with people in the house by saying hello. But do your own thing. They’re your housemates, not future best friends. Just people you live with. So you don’t need to share anything. It’s your business and not theirs. 

My new place is good. 6 people in total and before I moved in I made sure from the manager that it was a quiet house. Not a party house as that would be too much. I’m quite happy sharing now and after a year here I would class the guys here as acquaintances bordering on friends but it’s important that you have your BOUNDARIES set up. Your business is your business and no one will think less of you. 

Hope this helps, and i’ll keep an eye out for a response.