The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

[Blep]

Just needing to say that I have had a small victory today with putting my little man to sleep in his crib! It took forever to get him to sleep and it has only been about 10mins but I am on the couch ALONE typing this!
*happy dance*
@Shaz51 @Faith-and-Hope @CheerBear

[Shaz51]

hugs and understand @Blep , @CheerBear , @Faith-and-Hope , @HakunaKhunz , @saltandpepper 

love your profile pictures @Blep , @saltandpepper 

[Blep]

Thank you @Shaz51. Hope you had a lovely day 😁

[saltandpepper]

Thanks for the response @CheerBear he is 3 I still have plenty of time to adjust. I just can't even bear the thought of him being out of my protection though.

[saltandpepper]

Cheers @Shaz51 big fan of fight club

[CheerBear]

Yay @Blep! I hope you were able to get some you time in while he was asleep 🤞How long did he sleep for?

@saltandpepper there's not much that's as intense for me as my need to protect my kids and it's very hard to think about doing something that feels like it goes against that. Does he spend time with other family or friends without you now?

[saltandpepper]

@CheerBear  I guess we are pretty limited with options there. He has spent time with my Dad without me and plenty of time alone with my partner. We really don't have a lot of people we can go to. I'm sure my brother would love to hang out with my son, but he just doesn't get time. Barely has time for his own family as it is. I must admit, initially, I really struggled even leaving my son alone with my partner. There's parts of me that are irrational and controlled by fear and it stems from my own childhood. It's not something I've had to really face until having my own child though

[Faith-and-Hope]

I am in that zone at the moment with my disabled adult daughter @CheerBear @saltandpepper .

The situation with my soon2BX and his new partner threatens to undo a lifetime of social training for her .  They are trying to immerse her in the company, and standard of activities / approach to care provided to the n.p.'s very young children (K - 4) for their own convenience.  To achieve that they have to  discredit her actual ability level and development of independence.

It's hard.  There needs to be a level of trust that truth will prevail, but it sounds like you are managing very well with how difficult it is @saltandpepper  ...... go you ❣️

[CheerBear]

That is tricky if your options for having someone else look after your son are limited @saltandpepper.

I think having children makes many of us confront the way we have been raised ourselves and our early life experiences. If you've experienced things that scary and/or traumatic as a child, it makes sense that it could surface in a different way when you see the world through your own child's eyes. Do you have any support to work through your childhood? Professionals. family or friends etc?

There are parts of me that are controlled by fear too. Something that resonated with me, which you said earlier was that in a way, it has been helpful for you to have this vigilance (I think it was you that said this, I might be wrong). It's so difficult to learn how to let go when it no longer helpful to hold on or when you are in a situation where you have to let go, especially if it has served a purpose in the past.

@Faith-and-Hope sorry to hear you continue have difficulties with soon to be ex and his new partner.

[Former-Member]

Morning @Shaz51 🙂,
Hope you are well? ❤️