money doesn't fix it

[Former-Member]

Might go have that shower or straighten my hair

[outlander]

@Former-Member
Please if your suicidal think about talking to someone. Your safety is really important to me and many others. You deserve to live a happy life even if your thoughts say otherwise.
Can you do something nice for yourself before bed? And maybe start the day fresh and maybe do some of your artwork?

[Former-Member]

I’ll get through tonight thanks outlander, take something heavy, don’t wann pull you down. It doesn’t matter you know, I’ve lived a full life, even saved a few. It’s a small part of eternity being trapped here. I’m much older than you and fought through many dark times and some good. Mostly alone, but it doesn’t matter anymore.

[Appleblossom]

I am not sure if you missed my earlier posts. @Former-Member

I bet you have saved a few lives.

I was painfully aware as I posted that child loss and "abandonment" is a seriously heightened loss for you.

I make a plea for your beautiful son who embodies much of your positive effort and traits and genes.

You will probably not lose him, but he may feel he has to relate to more family.  I cannot  be sure, but I do sense, you both will come through this.  

I dont underestimate your spiritual strength.

It alright to fall down. We are ALL human.

Be alive and around to be a nanna.

Be alive and aorund to be YOU.

[Faith-and-Hope]

Hopefully some of that pain will have lifted by tomorrow @Former-Member ...... and I think of your girl often too ..... I have one with the same name.  You’re never far from

my mind ..... and I know this type of anniversary is really, really hard ......

Please stay close to the forums Hon.  You post such caring messages, and stunningly beautiful images for other people here ..... it’s your turn to just rest here ..... and be in the receiving end.

I am so glad you have posted tonight, letting us know how much pain and heartache you are feeling ..... and maybe the cigarettes are part of your self-care, just for tonight ..... and the wine and cup of tea will do you good.

💜💐💕💐💕💜🌷💕

[Former-Member]

I hate that my sone can’t stand me

[Faith-and-Hope]

Do you honestly think he can’t stand you @Former-Member ?  I think calling your sister may have just been thoughtless towards you, rather than vindictive.  A lot of his behaviours seem fairly matched to what lads of his age do .... they tend to be quite self-centred, in part because they don’t have to think far past themselves ..... but I wish he was more grateful and caring towards you.

[Former-Member]

I’m sorry my girl has same name as yours, but maybe it will make you value her more. It’s not fair I only had one and then lost her
Nobody understands it
But you have your son they say
But I don’t really
He’s male and will never understand
He also declares he never wants to propegate, continue on the genetics or become ransom by them,
My son doesn’t know God / Jesus, hates me mentioning my faith. This is sadest part for me.
Did I tell you my sis goes to church? I don’t understand how her treatment of me is compatible with faith in Christ.
Or these dark thoughts I guess

[Faith-and-Hope]

I am not sorry my girl has the same name as yours @Former-Member ..... it gives us a link ......

Yes, I don’t understand how your sister justifies her behaviour towards you to herself.  I am really upset for you.  The compassion and empathy you derserve from her is completely missing ...... but some people are like that, and they will reap what

they sow.  Just you keep right on being who you are @Former-Member ..... and your son doesn’t know yet what he will be doing or feeling in ten years from now.  If he meets someone he falls head over heels for, and they want kids, he might change his mind .... you never know ..... and that person might adore you ..... you never know with that too.

[Former-Member]

My son probably isn’t meaning to be vindictive
Did I tell you, when I was in hospital in lockdown after my girl died he and my sister had a conversation about how they’d clear out my hoard of a house when / if I die and jointly decided hiring a giant skip would be the only solution.
I told him tonight I’ll be going away by the water for her birthday.
I can’t stand that the only person who bothers to visit me is a pot head who who asks for money every time he sees me