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Pinkpurple24
New Contributor

Help supporting my partner with OCD

Hi 

my partner has been diagnosed with OCD and anxiety. I have no idea how to support him through this. I am finding it really hard to live with and our marriage is suffering due to this. We have a baby and I feel terrible that I just don’t have the patience and time to give him at the moment. 
Where do I start? What can I do to help? 

1 REPLY 1

Re: Help supporting my partner with OCD

Hi @Pinkpurple24,

Welcome to the Forums. My name is FloatingFeather and I am one of the peer support workers at SANE. It is nice to have you with us. 

It sounds like you have quite a bit going on at the moment that may feel overwhelming. Supporting someone with a mental health diagnosis can be really hard, particularly if this is something you have not come across before. It would imagine it would also be hard trying to navigate what your husband is going through whilst taking care of a baby.

Your feelings around not knowing how to support your husband and finding things difficult to live with makes absolute sense. I have a family member with a complex mental health diagnoses that I have emotionally supported for many years so I understand how demanding and overwhelming it can be. I also am the mother of three children so I know how hard taking care of a baby is. 

My main concern is that you can get some support for you at the moment. I know from my own experience that it is impossible to take care of someone's emotional needs when you yourself are depleted. Do you have a GP you can reach out to? From what I understand GPs can refer you for 6-10 free counselling sessions. It may be good for you to speak to someone in a professional capacity so you can get the support you need.

There are a couple of good carer support organisations that may be able to offer you some support / guidance. Here are the links:

Carers Australia 

Carer Gateway 

From my experience as a carer the person in the storm (in my case my family member and in your case your husband) typically gets professional support (which is great). What is not so great is that often the carer gets a bit forgotten in the mix. I remember my family member's therapist said (amongst other tools they suggested for my family member) to lean on me when things got to much. I remember thinking `that's okay but what about if things are too much for me'?

So in answer to your question I would suggest you first start with getting some support for yourself so that you can better support your baby and your husband. Reach out to other people that you trust (whether it be family, friends or professional) but know that you don't have to carry this all alone. 

It is good (when you are ready) to research a bit around what your husband has been diagnosed with. In my case I found this helpful to better understand my family member, better understand what they were going through, and better understand how I could help.

Be kind to yourself, know you aren't alone and know there is help out there - for both you and your husband.

I wish you all the best.

FloatingFeather 

 

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